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What We Get Wrong About Habits

What We Get Wrong About Habits

And How to Make Meaningful Change According to an Expert

Aidan Weinmann
September 15, 2023

Hey - We’re officially halfway into September.

You know what that means?

Autumn is almost upon us. And with last night’s New Moon, we have an optimal opportunity to embrace a fresh start.

The stretch between the summer & holidays is, personally, my favorite time of the year to deepen into healthy habits.

Today, we’re exploring the psychology of habits, revealing some of the common missteps, as well as secrets behind James Clear’s renowned “4 Laws of Behavior Change.”

What We Get Wrong About Habits:

Overestimating Willpower: For the first three years post-college, I was convinced that maintaining good habits was all about motivation.

When I inevitably fell short, I thought more self-discipline could fix it. This led to cycles of “falling off the wagon” and feelings of shame & burnout.

Turns out, motivation is finite, like a draining battery. There’s a simpler way, as I discussed in this previous newsletter; Environment Beats Motivation Every Day of the Week. Keep reading; we’ll break it down.

Focusing on Goals, Not Systems: It’s a common pitfall. We are conditioned to obsess over setting goals, often sidelining the critical work of crafting systems that support healthy ways of living. Sure, goals provide direction, but it’s systems that actually drive lasting change.

Expecting Quick Results: Because today’s culture glorifies instant gratification, it’s easy to expect immediate results when you start a new routine or behavior. When we build an expectation, especially an unrealistic one, we inevitably get let down. Remember, “expectation is the thief of joy,” as the wise folks say.

Believing It's All or Nothing: As a recovering perfectionist, this idea hits close to home. I used to think that I needed to perfectly stick to a routine to see real change. When I missed a day or hit a setback, I’d throw in the towel, convinced I’d failed.

In reality, perfection is an illusion, and slip-ups are just pit-stops on the road to sustainable progress.

The Four Laws of Behavior Change:

In his book, Atomic Habits, James Clear explains a powerful framework for establishing positive habits & breaking negative ones.

Known as the "Four Laws of Behavior Change,” the system entails four sets of paradoxes, listed below:

Make it Obvious // Invisible
Make it Attractive // Unattractive
Make it Easy // Difficult
Make it Satisfying // Unsatisfying

Let’s dive into what these laws entail and how they can help you cultivate healthier routines.

Make it Obvious: This law suggests that if you want to establish a habit, it’s helpful to make it as obvious as possible in your environment. This means setting up cues that remind you to perform the habit. For example, if you want to develop the habit of drinking more water, you could place a water bottle on your desk, so it’s easily visible & accessible.

Make It Invisible: On the other hand, for breaking bad habits, making them less visible goes a long way. One of my favorite tactics here is hiding candy or junk food in the highest kitchen cabinet. That way, it limits the amount of time I see those items, so I’m less likely to make moves on unhealthy food choices.

Make It Attractive: This law emphasizes making desirable habits more appealing. Finding ways to associate positive emotions or rewards with your habits is key. If you want to begin exercising more, for example, you could make it attractive by choosing activities you genuinely enjoy or inviting a friend.

Make it Unattractive: For breaking bad habits, it helps to make them less appealing. This involves highlighting the negative consequences or costs associated with the habit. For example, if you’re trying to cut down on spending, track your expenses and consider the impact on your financial goals. Seeing how much money you’re spending/wasting can make the habit of overspending much less attractive.

Make It Easy: When you simplify the process of performing good habits, you’re more likely to stick to them. For instance, if you want to develop a writing habit, write one sentence a day. Start small. Make it easy. You’ll be likely inclined to extend that time as the habit develops.

Make It Difficult: Conversely, when you increase the effort required to engage in bad habits, you’re less likely to indulge. A recent personal example is using a wall projection as my television. When I want to watch a show or game, I must go through the setup process for the projector, which adds a layer of friction and deters me from spending excessive time in front of the screen.

Here’s a line from “Atomic Habits” that really drives home this point— “Whether we are approaching behavior change as an individual, a parent, a coach, or a leader, we should ask ourselves the same question, ‘How can we design a world where it’s easy to do what’s right?’ Redesign your life so the actions that matter most are also the actions that are easiest to do.”

Make It Satisfying: It’s important to toward yourself for completing your desired habits. Creating a positive association with the habit reinforces us to do it again. For example, if you want to establish a habit of daily meditation, you could reward yourself with a warm cup of tea or coffee once you complete the practice.

Make It Unsatisfying: When tackling bad habits, it’s helpful to introduce consequences that make the habit unsatisfying. An amusing yet highly effective method is committing to donate to a cause you oppose if you fail to keep your word.

Quotes from Atomic Habits:

Throughout Atomic Habits, James Clear makes great use of quotes from historical figures. Here are a few of the ones that stood out to me:

“In the long history of humankind, those who learned to collaborate and improvise most effectively have prevailed.” Charles Darwin
“It is emotion that allows you to mark things as good, bad, or indifferent.” Antonio Damasio
“A genius is not born but is educated and trained.” Laszlo Polgar
“The first rule of compounding: never interrupt it unnecessarily.” Charlie Munger
“The best is the enemy of the good” Voltaire
“Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate.” Carl Jung