important decisions

Hey friend,

I missed you last week.

It was the first time I skipped a newsletter in 2024.

I needed to catch my breath.

Don’t we all sometimes?

~ take a breathe ~ 

On one hand, writing & sharing for 20 weeks in a row felt great because I find an inherent satisfaction in honoring my commitments.

+ Consistency builds momentum. 

On the other hand though, giving yourself grace and/or space is crucial to making things sustainable over the long term.

The trick is finding the balance between the two.

When do we honor consistency & when do we grant ourselves flexibility?

Did you feel like you needed to slow down this past week?

What about 2024 as a whole? 

It’s already May for fucks sake.

(I’m gonna curse here from time to time – sorry grandma)

I have a feeling that I’m not the only one looking for life to slow down and/or chill out. 

2024 feels heavy, already.

The world looks chaotic yet beautiful. Scary yet exciting. Scarce yet abundant.

Paradox is all around us.

So today, we’re diving deeper on that concept.

More specifically, how to make decisions through the lens of paradox.

Perhaps there’s something the personal can illustrate about the universal.

Let’s begin.

Last week, a few big things came to a head all at the same time for me.

During Monday’s check-in with my manager, I was informed that I’d get to tackle a highly visible & time-sensitive project during the week ahead. Time to lock in.

I worked until 9:30PM that night & hit the pillow absolutely exhausted.

On Tuesday, an old situation resurfaced, rekindling all sorts of tough emotions.

Then Wednesday night arrives, and it’s 9pm.

I had just indulged with a little “wow-this-has-been-a-freaking-week” joint, and Nadine gets a call that presents us with our biggest decision to date.

It’s funny how life works sometimes. It’s all a wave, as they say ~

More on that big decision next month ;)

With this sequence of events & the general state of the world, I decided that last week’s newsletter was not a priority.

I needed the space of flexibility more than the momentum & fulfillment of consistency.

This is an inconsequential micro-example of how embracing paradox can effectively direct our decision-making.

It highlights the delicate balance between structure & adaptability, reminding us that sometimes, it's necessary to veer off course to navigate the complexities of life with greater ease and grace.

Here are a few other paradoxes & questions that I find helpful in decision making:

Expansiveness vs. Contraction

• Which option feels most expansive & which feels contracting?

• How can you create more expansive feelings in your life?

• What feels contracting & in what ways can you remove those things?

Assistance vs. Autonomy

• When do you need to put your head down & push through a challenge?

• And when is it more effective to ask for help?

Taking Risk vs. Finding Security

• What areas of your life do you feel comfortable taking risks in?

• Where do you prioritize security & stability?

• Does the risk outweigh the reward? Or is security more worthwhile?

Listening vs. Speaking

• In what situations do you feel called to speak & share your thoughts or opinions?

• And when is it time to sit back, ask questions, and absorb information?

Openness vs. Conviction

• When do you find it beneficial to approach situations with an open mind?

• Conversely, when do you feel it's important to hold firm to your convictions, even in the face of opposition?

Ultimately, it’s the question of one thing vs. it’s opposite.

I believe that the ability to acknowledge & seek balance between competing ideas is one of the most important skills in today’s complex world.

It's about recognizing that truth often lies in the space between extremes, and that embracing paradox can lead to more thoughtful decisions & a deeper understanding of ourselves & the world around us.

Thanks for Reading

Today’s piece was mega-different. 

What came up?

What paradoxes did I miss?

Big love,

Aidan